Bratz doll sez, “Okay, even I think this is a bit crass.”: New Online Game Let’s You Create Your Own Bimbo
There’s a new online game craze among the tween set in England and France. It’s called “Miss Bimbo”, and it’s exactly as progressive and delightful as it sounds. Basically, it’s like Tamagotchi, except with vapid sluts instead of kawaii little digital animals. According to the website, some of the goals of the game are:
- Shop for the latest fashions and become the trendsetting bimbo in town!
- Become a socialite and skyrocket to the top of fame and popularity!
- Date that famous hottie you’ve had your eye on and show the Bimbo world the social starlet you are!
- Even resort to meds or plastic surgery. Stop at nothing to become the reigning bimbo!
You, too, can be just like Miss Teen South Carolina and, like, such as! Furiously pursue social acceptance and hollow aesthetic beauty! What meaningful life lessons! I bet Heidi Montag and Charlotte Allen would be great at this game.
Nicolas Jacquart, the game’s creator, responding to the predictably furious uproar from every single self-respecting woman in the world, exudes the smug hiptard charm of so many of his fellow Frenchmen (along with the odor of cigarettes and moldy cheese):
“The game is structured in such a way that it simply mirrors real life in a tongue-in-cheek way. It is not a bad influence for young children. The missions and goals for the bimbos are morally sound and teach children about the real world.”
Right, the “real world”, where 9-year-old girls understand irony and get boob jobs! He also explained that “bimbos” lose happiness points when they eat too much chocolate and get fat, so it’s clearly teaching the girls healthy nutrition. Oh, and the breast implants? They’re “only one facet,” so pay no attention to the plastic surgeon behind the curtain.
We take back everything good we’ve ever said about the French.
via Jezebel
9 comments
Monopoly’s out, sorry Donald Trump. Better make way for Paris Hilton and Kim Kardashian!
Next, we should have a game where you try to sleep with as many prostitutes as possible without your wife finding out — it promotes critical thinking skills!
Bonus points if you can get them to go bareback! You win the game if you pass on the clap to your unsuspecting spouse!
Uh oh, herpes outbreak. Lose a turn.
[…] Natasha illustrated her brilliant point with visual AIDS. She also introduced us to her french beaver. Thus forgiving France for that whole selling out their own people to the GERMANS thingy. Then we took it back. […]
Yeah, yeah, “the French this, the French that, blah blah blah” same old BULLSHIT as ever. Friggin broken record. Grow out of it, you morons. The game is most popular in your beloved UK. How do you explain that, huh? The world doesn’t seem to mind the French so much, considering France is by far the most visited country with Paris the number 1 destination for tourists. That includes americans. If you prefer to spend your vacation in some Alabama town (sorry, can’t think of any specific one. Can anyone?), knock yourself out.
For starters, check out http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_assets_owned_by_Vivendi
Educate yourself bout the might of little France in US media.
Then, check
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Category:Companies_of_France
and learn more about France’s assets in the World. You will undoubtedly ID some familiar names which you thought were US.
Then ponder on this history and longevity of a country which is 5% of the US in size and 20% of the US in population. At some point, France owned half of the World. There are two groups of nations in the World:
The Almighty Sempiternal : France and the UK
The Restless Rest : the rest.
As far as the French being cowards, weasels, and je-ne-sais-quoi-encore, reflect upon facts and numbers. In the 20th century alone, France lost ~2,200,000 citizens in wars. This represents about 0.035% of its current population. In comparison, the US lost ~494,000 citizens, that is about 0.00165% of its current population. You do the math (if you’re clever enough): France lost 22 times more people at war than the US in the 20th century alone.
But I’m not even hoping to make you change your mind. After all, 60% US citizens think the Sun revolves around the Earth; 54% that 9/11 was an inside job (39% in France, and 47% in the UK); 55% that Canada is a US state; 67% that the Earth is less than 10,000 years old.
Thereby contributing into making the US the laughing stock of the universe as we non-US earthlings know it.
—- for your patriotic enjoyment —–
This is a transcript of an actual radio conversation of a US Naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland in October 1995. The transcipt of the Radio conversation was released by the Chief of Naval operations on the 10th october 1995.
Americans: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the North to avoid a collision.
Canadians: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid collision.
Americans: This is the Captain of a US Navy Ship, I say again, divert your course.
Canadians: Number One, I say again, divert your course.
Americans: This is the aircraft carrier USS Lincoln, the second largest ship in the United States Atlantic fleet. We are accompanied by three destroyers, three cruisers and numerous support vessels. I demand that you change your course 15 degrees noth. Thats on five degrees north, or counter measures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.
Canadians: This is a lighthouse. Your call.
pwned
^ lmao
Parents should be parents and filter out the crap there kids can access on the internet. I play this game while I’m at work sometimes and I find it entertaining and I get the whole tongue-n-cheek vibe from it. Americans just seem to get their panties in a twist over this silliest things.
Anne Coultier, out of the long list of French owned companies I only recognized 2 and already knew they were not American. Chanel and Bugatti. The first list of assets owned by Vivendi did surprise me though. As far as your statistics on percentage of Americans who believe blah blah…, what is your source? Elementary schools? Almost anyone I’ve talked to knows better than what them statistics show.
First off Karlita not all americans are like that…im a american and I play on miss bimbo all the time. I know a lot of people that play this gay. so I dont like that fact that you said “americans” cause im pretty sure that there are some poeple there that dont like this game..but you dont see me calling them out like that
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